Basically it’s lights, camera, action baby!

You need to be the social centre for the room and be higher energy than everyone else is. People will be subdued and nervous... so it is easy.

Remember it is an absurd situation, so roll with it. This sort of situation does not come about naturally so don’t act natural.

Now for the real secret to successful speed dating...

...the really powerful time is before, between and after the actual speed dates.

You see the 2 minute dates themselves are ridiculously difficult to build any sort of connection with a girl. You might be able to be seen as attractive but you will never be able to connect as soul mates in such a short amount of time.

But there is a solution - talking with her outside of those two minutes.

Important Note: The Different answers we just prepared are for the dates! When talking outside of the 2 minute dates DO NOT use them as you appear different simply by approaching a girl.... trust me... using these lines outside of the dates makes you look like you are tring too hard.

When the event begins there is normally a crowd of men by the bar and several groups of women.

Now is the time to approach as soon as you see the girl you like. There are so many things going for you at this point it almost seems like cheating.

Firstly you are among men who are not really competition, if they knew what you know they would approach the girls straight away... so let them wait for the dates. And when they get to the dates they will be Mr. Smith, from Hampshire and working as an accountant - not anything different.

Approaching a woman without waiting for the "dates" shows that you have more balls than all the other guys, and women like balls. All the women will notice that you are talking to women and not staying in the safety of the group of men, so you score points with all the women not just the ones you approach

Secondly as we have already established these girls are desperate enough to pay money to meet men, they are doing all they can to meet you.

Lastly you can get a large amount of time in before the event; you can talk, ask questions and get to know them. By the time the "dates" start you already know each other better than anyone else in the room.

This makes the actual "dates" easier too, you know that a couple of them are going to be much more straight forward than the others... these provide a nice break from the brutality.

So armed with you story as an opener, or your confidence to just start talking on a random subject make your approach early.

Remember the women are extremely unlikely to be rude to you in this situation. They know you are going to have to leave them alone when the dates start and also everyone else that they will be dating is there watching them. So really there is nothing to lose here.

If people are not standing remember to move chairs around to sit with women you want to, this is very good behaviour.

On the dates you have you notes to stand out and you can use a question/story. Another tip is to talk about the event and not about each other. You can’t get to know her in a couple of minutes so don’t bother... assume that you know each other and talk like friends... talk about the environment not each other. The only thing which seems like it breaks this rule (but really doesn’t) is to find out who she came with... this is not only useful to know, but also is still about "other" things than her and you.

Also talking about her "other dates" is good.

BUT AT ALL COSTS AVOID ASKING:

• How old are you?
• Where are you from?
• What do you do?

It’s ok for her to ask you and you to give her an attention getting answer, but I forbid you to ask those questions. In fact for a laugh you CAN ask if the other guys have been asking those questions and then laugh about how lame they are. Also you can laugh at HER for asking you the same questions that she was saying boring guys ask her... this is a very confident and funny thing to do.

So between is while there is a short break in the dating. Here you can either... approach another woman that you haven’t before; approach one that you have had a speed date with or return to one you approached earlier.

And lastly after the dating has completed is again the best time to make an approach. However there is the danger that she is going to leave soon after if she has really become attracted to anyone yet or simply because the event is over so it’s just kinda natural to leave. So approaching before is best, between is brilliant and after is ok - so get in there as soon as possible.

You want to spend as much time with women as possible at these events.

If there is a pattern here you are spotting good, I’ll make it clear approach at all times possible and expect more from the effort you put in there than on the dates.

Last thing about the events are please ignore a warning not ask for a number. I don’t mean to use it as practice to go round and ask all the women for their numbers as practice, but if there is one girl you like, you have connected then get her number... this is much better than waiting for a tick and sending her an email.